


A Calculated Risk

by Telaryn



Series: The Tale of Eliot Spencer and Ellen Harvelle [19]
Category: Leverage, Supernatural
Genre: Comfort, Crossover, Episode Related, F/M, Friendship, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Past Relationship(s), Secrets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-21
Updated: 2012-05-21
Packaged: 2017-11-23 19:20:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/625669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Telaryn/pseuds/Telaryn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When a job takes them through Nebraska, Nate suggests that Eliot look in on Ellen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Calculated Risk

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [](http://www.dreamwidth.org/profile?user=angst_bingo)[](http://www.dreamwidth.org/profile?user=angst_bingo)**angst_bingo** 's Round 3, for the prompt "just this once".

It was a mark of how much his life had changed that Eliot didn’t even realize they were within fifty miles of the small Nebraska town Ellen Harvelle called home until Nate pointed it out. “We can spare you if you want to take a couple days…” the mastermind offered.

It was a lie, but Eliot recognized the gesture for what it was. Nate was the only one in his life who had met Ellen, who had seen what she meant to him. “I shouldn’t risk it,” he said finally, staring out at the star-lit Nebraska sky.

Nate came up beside him then, leaning on the balcony railing. “You mean emotionally?”

Eliot smiled bitterly, accepting the jab as well. “You know my reasons for leaving her, Nate. They haven’t changed.”

The older man was quiet for a long moment. “I know the look you get on your face when you think about her, Eliot – and it’s a lot more often than I think even you’re comfortable with.” He sighed. “I know you haven’t asked Hardison to check up on her, and I’m betting you haven’t used any of your own contacts either.”

“I’m not going to risk alerting people by watching her,” Eliot said. “Even at a distance – I swore I was going to make it a clean break.”

“Clean for who?” Nate asked. “Look – I’m just pointing out that we’re practically in her backyard. You’ll never have a better opportunity to see for yourself if she’s okay.” He clapped Eliot on the shoulder. “I won’t mention it again, but if you decide you want to go…”  
***********  
Once it was planted, the idea wouldn’t leave him. Eliot couldn’t even find the heart to complain about the fact that Nate had raised the subject on purpose. _If you didn’t already want to be convinced…_ By morning he had spun himself a flawless rationalization that he would just go and look in on her. No contact – just seeing for himself that she was okay, that he hadn’t left any lasting damage in his wake.

His last sensible act was to ask Nate to accompany him on the side-trip. Eliot never admitted that he wasn’t sure he could trust himself to maintain his distance once he saw Ellen, but Nate understood anyway.

They left shortly after dawn. Eliot could see the questions, but Nate stood solidly between him and the others, insisting that they continue on to meet up with their client on schedule. The only one who looked as though he wasn’t willing to give in quietly was Hardison, but Eliot saw Sophie take him by the arm as soon as they’d agreed on their rendezvous point and knew he wouldn’t have to worry.

He’d expected to be bombarded with questions as soon as he and Nate were alone, but the mastermind settled easily into the passenger seat of Eliot’s truck, found the jazz station on the satellite radio and nursed the coffee he’d gotten from the hotel’s meager restaurant.

It left Eliot with too much time to think; something he tried very hard not to do when it came to Ellen. They had never supposed to meet. He still didn’t know what instinct had driven him to her bar that night, or why she had let him stay beyond the first night they’d spent together. Honestly, the only thing he could easily explain _was_ that first night. _Saving the damsel in distress,_ he thought, smiling at the look Ellen would give him if she’d been there.

If he’d been willing to be completely honest with himself, Eliot knew that he _could_ answer all the questions he’d left around his relationship with Ellen Harvelle. He just didn’t like what the answers would reveal about his life and the choices he’d made.

“Okay, now you need to share,” Nate said – almost as if he’d been reading Eliot’s mind. For all Eliot knew, he had been.

The hitter chuckled softly. “I was just trying to figure if there was another time in my life when I could have made things work. Say if we’d met ten years sooner than we did?”

Nate was silent for a moment. “And?” he asked at last.

“And,” Eliot said, “I realized ten years earlier and she likely wouldn’t have given me the time of day.” His chest tightened as he realized his hands were automatically making the turn onto the street where Harvelle’s Roadhouse stood. _She won’t be there,_ he thought. It was a little after nine in the morning – Ellen would likely just be getting up. Eliot could see her in his memory, wrapped up in her bathrobe, nursing her morning coffee on the front porch.

He became aware that Nate had straightened up a moment before his brain registered what he was seeing through the windshield. Or rather, _not_ seeing.

“Is that..?” Nate asked, as a stretch of blasted ground came into view.

Eliot could only nod, licking suddenly dry lips as the truck eased to a stop at the edge of the property. He didn’t bother trying to convince himself that he’d made a mistake, they were in the wrong place…he’d forgotten how to get there. He didn’t forget. Everything connected to his life with Ellen was carved so deep in his memory he couldn’t have forgotten if his life depended on it.

The land was clear of any evidence that there had ever been a structure here, the ground blasted clear of grass or plant life as if the hand of God had reached down and wiped Harvelle’s Roadhouse from the face of the earth.

“What do you think happened?” Nate asked.

Eliot couldn’t answer him.


End file.
